Intertwined

We did a newborn photo shoot for the girls. The photographer posted one of the pictures on her Facebook page. I love this picture of the girls, so close together and loving on one another. Charlotte is on the left, Michelle is on the right. Michelle is the one who is always reaching over to Charlotte and holding on to her. Michelle is baby b,  the gymnastic.

Due Date

Yesterday was my due date. It was a  pretty uneventful day as I just spent time with my girls and took them to the park to play and enjoyed there smiles.
Today I found out that during my mellow day, two Surro sister's of mine had very hard deliveries. One was pregnant with twins, delivered baby A vaginally with no problems. Baby B ended up having cord Prolapse, meaning the cord came down in to the birth canal before the baby. This cuts of the oxygen to baby and requires an emergency c-section. She is recovery and doing ok, but to have a double whammy delivery will be a harder recovery. I hope she has the support to help her over the next few weeks.

The other Surro sister had a very rare complication. Placenta accreta. This is when your placenta grows in to your uterus. I'm not sure if she knew about this prior to delivery, but after she delivered her surro baby, and her placenta didn't come out she had to have a hysterectomy. She was not done having children of her own and was planning on doing a sibling journey for this family.  These are things that will NEVER be possible for her. I can not image the devastation and heart ache that would cause. She has very loving IPs and I know they will help out as much as possible, but nothing can replace that loss.
As a Surrogate, you know that loss of your uterus is possible. It's written in your contract that you could lose it and will be compensated for it, but that compensation can never make up for not having another child of your own. And it's not something to be taken lightly.  Many surrogates don't think these things will happen to them, because they never happened with their own pregnancies. The reality is: they haven't happened YET. And YET stands for You're Eligible Too.

The girls have arrived!

I did it! The girls are here and I'm so happy to bring life into this world.  That Morning of the induction I was really emotional and did not want to be induced.  It took me a bit to get out of the house and was late getting to the hospital.  My doctor knew about my mom passing and was very understanding. 

When I showed up the doctor checked me and I was 4cm, 80% effaced, and -2 station. My doctor broke my water at 9am and boy was that a weird feeling!  I had so much fluid and felt like I was sitting in a warm bath.  After that it would only be a matter of time before my contractions started.  At first they were mild and easy to manage but they quickly got extremely intense and I was having a hard time keeping my mind in a peaceful place.  I was very upset about my mom not being there, that I couldn't call her and had been crying most of the morning prior to the induction.  

Birth IS mental.  I have done this before, 4 times and know that when my mind is in a good place my birth is easy and peaceful.  My Doula, who has been with me at my last two births, knows me very well and how I react and handle birth.  She could see me struggling as I was crying through my contractions unable to relax. I could see the girls mom feeling sad for me as she knew about the loss of my mother and yet wanting to be so excited for the birth of her daughters. My Doula had a heart to heart with me and after, I decided that I wanted the epidural.  This was to be a joyous moment and I felt that was getting lost.  I knew we were getting close to delivery as my body normally starts off a bit slow, then takes off like a light switch is turn on.  At this point it is 11:15 and the nurse checks me.  I am 6cm dilated, so she calls in the epidural.  I do not know what time it is, but I do remember her checking me again not long after and I am almost an 8.  The anesthesiologist shows up and does the quickest run down of the pros and cons of the epi and then give me one quick dose.  I am not sure why, but that was so painful!  I truly believe it was because I could not relax and I know that being tense makes everything 1000x worse.  The crazy thing was during it, I could feel my body starting to have the urge to push!!!  I almost got off the bed to go walk to the OR because I didn't think I was going to have time to get the epi and get over there.  Here with twins, you have to deliver in the OR vaginally just in case you need asection.  As soon as he was done with the epidural they wheeled me over to the OR.  The dose kicked in just enough that I could feel my self pushing baby A out and was no longer feeling the discomfort from the contractions.  Birthing her was so exciting and exhilarating! Her mother was right there to witness the whole thing!! The doctor put her on my stomach so we could do the delayed cord clamping and then her mom got to cut her cord and hold her before they checked her out. She was 6lb 12oz, 18" long! Beautifully pink and alert!!  Her mom was crying and came to my side and thanked me over and over.  Then she went to be with her daughter while the doctors worked on getting baby B in position for birth.  She was in a very unique position.  If you can imagine this, she was Frank Breech position, so her feet were up by her face, BUT she was head down. Because of this she was moving down well in to my pelvis and the doctors felt they needed to do some manual manipulation to help her out.  They broke my water and used a suction cup to help get her in to place.  Doing this meant that my doctor had his whole hand inside me in order to get the suction up on her head.  He was pulling her down while I had another doctor pushing on my stomach to get her down as well.  I also had a nurse at each leg pulling them back as far as possible to help get her out.  The girls mom said I looking like a wishbone being pulled in half.  Baby B came out head first with her feet, and a hand, by her face.  She was born very quickly and because of that had a very bruised face.  At first she was non responsive and the doctor did not do the delayed cord clamping for her and quickly gave her to the doctors, nurses to check her.  She perked up after that and started crying and didn't need any assistance at all.  She was 6lbs 1oz 17 1/2".  

The girls mom and dad were so grateful for the delivery of their two very healthy, happy girls.  They let me nurse the girls in the hospital and I got to spend quality time with them as a family.  My DF was so amazing through this whole process as well.  He supported every decision and was right there with me holding my hand, rubbing my back, speaking words of love and encouragement to me.  I am one of the luckiest girls in the world to have him by my side. He even went home and brought our girls back to the hospital to meet the babies, or "friends" as my daughter calls them.  

I have been blessed to have such a wonderful experience doing this and would consider doing it again just to see the joy it brings a family.  

37 week's & induction!

Tomorrow is the big day!  Time for these girl's to come earth side and meet their parents.

I'm excited and nervous and ready and not ready!! Lol. Tomorrow is a beautiful day, a day of gratitude, life, and joy. A day that had been long awaited.

I didn't want to be induced, but the time has come and I'm rolling with it.

Many prayers for a beautiful birth and a safe delivery!!

Gone to soon

With a heavy heart I am sad to say that my mom passed away on pi day. 3.14.15

I miss her terribly. I know she is watch over me and is always with me.

I never thought this day would come so soon.... But I'm grateful for all the time I spent with her making memories.

I love you mommy.

The List

So here is a list of things I can try to get labor going:

* Sex! It's not the act itself but the hormones the help things along. Orgasms happen from oxytocin, the love hormone, and it is also what causes contractions. Also, prostaglandins in semen help soften the cervix, which will help it to dilate and efface.

*Chiropractor - get body and babies lined up for delivery.

*Bouncing on a birth ball - applying pressure to cervix to help dilate and working with gravity to pull baby down

*Walking - Gets those hips moving allowing baby down in the birth canal

*Acupuncture - hasn't tried it but hear it helps you're body to relax so birth is possible.

*Supplements - EPO aka Evening Primrose Oil. Also good for softening the cervix. Also a supplement called birth prep. Natural herbs in pill form to get your body ready. Also put Sage Oil on my belly every 3-4 hours should help bring on labor.

*Reiki Matter - A couple of my birth students had a reiki master work on getting their energy in line and ended up in labor shortly after that. I have had so much stress that doing this should be helpful

*Coffee Potty - basically, you sit above a bowl of caffeinated coffee and hot water for 30 mins max to help dilate your cervix.

* Nipple Stimulation - I have a pump and again, this stimulates oxytocin and help with contracts.

Some I have already tried, and others not yet. I will keep you posted.

36 Week's

I was checked on Monday 3.9.15 and I am now currently 36 weeks! Woooo hooo! So happy I made it this far.
Per ultrasound girls are about 6lbs 3oz and 5lbs 9 oz. I know this can be off, but I'm sure its close. So about 11lbs 12oz of baby in me! What great sizes for the girls. Penny was 9lbs 11 oz and they never thought she would be that big.
My Cervix is 2cm and is moving forward out of the posterior position. This is good. Normally your cervix will tuck it's self back until it's closer to delivery day. Then it starts to move forward in order to open and let baby out.
My doctor has scheduled an induction date of 3.20.15 and I would love to avoid it at all cost!
Yes I can fight against that date, but the parents are ready to meet their girls, so I'm trying to find balance between a natural birth and induction. The parents are not pushy about any of it and I think I could talk to them if I need to about waiting on the induction.
For now I will put together a list of ideas to help get my body to relax and let go for birth.